(73) Good Manners

CHAPTER 1. Who is more entitled to be treated with the best companionship?

8:2 Narrated by Abu Huraira
A man came to Allah’s Apostle and said, “O Allah’s Apostle! Who is more entitled to be treated with the best companionship by me?” The Prophet said, “Your mother.” The man said. “Who is next?” The Prophet said, “Your mother.” The man further said, “Who is next?” The Prophet said, “Your mother.” The man asked for the fourth time, “Who is next?” The Prophet said, “Your father. “

CHAPTER 2. A man should not abuse his parents.

8:4 Narrated by ‘Abdullah bin ‘Amr
Allah’s Apostle said. “It is one of the greatest sins that a man should curse his parents.” It was asked (by the people), “O Allah’s Apostle! How does a man curse his parents?” The Prophet said, “‘The man abuses the father of another man and the latter abuses the father of the former and abuses his mother.”

CHAPTER 3. The sin of Al-Qâti’ (person who severs the bond of kinship).

8:13 Narrated by Jubair bin Mut’im
That he heard the Prophet saying, “The person who severs the bond of kinship will not enter Paradise.”

CHAPTER 4. Allah will keep good relations with the one who will keep good relations with his kith and kin.

(Means (a) to visit them (b) to help them financially (c) to speak good words with (to) them.)

8:17 Narrated by Abu Huraira
The Prophet said, “The word ‘Ar-Rahm (womb) derives its name from Ar-Rahman (i.e., one of the names of Allah) and Allah said: ‘I will keep good relation with the one who will keep good relation with you, (womb i.e. Kith and Kin) and sever the relation with him who will sever the relation with you, (womb, i.e. Kith and Kin).

CHAPTER 5. The Rahm i.e., womb (bond of kinship) remains fresh and fruitful if one looks after it always.

8:19 Narrated by ‘Amr bin Al-‘As
I heard the Prophet saying openly not secretly, “The family of Abu so-and-so (i.e. Talib) are not among my protectors.” ‘Amr said that there was a blank space (1) in the Book of Muhammad bin Ja’far. He added, “My Protector is Allah and the righteous believing people.” ‘Amr bin Al-‘As added: I heard the Prophet saying, ‘But they (that family) have kinship (Rahm) with me and I will be good and dutiful to them.”

CHAPTER 6. AI-Wâsil (the one who keeps good relations with his kith and kin) is not the one who recompenses the good done to him by his relatives.

8:20 Narrated by Abdullah bin ‘Amr
The Prophet said, “Al-Wasil is not the one who recompenses the good done to him by his relatives, but Al-Wasil is the one who keeps good relations with those relatives who had severed the bond of kinship with him.”

CHAPTER 7. To be merciful to one’s children, kiss them and embrace them. lAnas said: The Prophet kissed and smelled (his son) Ibrâhim.

8:27 Narrated by ‘Aisha
A bedouin came to the Prophet and said, “You (people) kiss the boys! We don’t kiss them.” The Prophet said, “I cannot put mercy in your heart after Allah has taken it away from it.”
8:28 Narrated by ‘Umar bin Al-Khattab
Some Sabi (i.e. war prisoners, children and woman only) were brought before the Prophet and behold, a woman amongst them was milking her breasts to feed and whenever she found a child amongst the captives, she took it over her chest and nursed it (she had lost her child but later she found him) the Prophet said to us, “Do you think that this lady can throw her son in the fire?” We replied, “No, if she has the power not to throw it (in the fire).” The Prophet then said, “Allah is more merciful to His slaves than this lady to her son.”

CHAPTER 8. Allah divided mercy into one hundred parts.

8:29 Narrated by Abu Huraira
I heard Allah’s Apostle saying, Allah divided Mercy into one-hundred parts and He kept its ninety-nine parts with Him and sent down its one part on the earth, and because of that, its one single part, His creations are Merciful to each other, so that even the mare lifts up its hoofs away from its baby animal, lest it should trample on it.”

CHAPTER 9. Putting the child on the thigh.

8:32 Narrated by Usama bin Zaid
Allah’s Apostle used to put me on (one of) his thighs and put Al-Hasan bin ‘Ali on his other thigh, and then embrace us and say, “O Allah! Please be Merciful to them, as I am merciful to them.”

CHAPTER 10. (What is said regarding) being merciful to the people and to the animals.

8:39 Narrated by Abu Huraira
Allah’s Apostle stood up for the prayer and we too stood up along with him. Then a bedouin shouted while offering prayer. “O Allah! Bestow Your Mercy on me and Muhammad only and do not bestow it on anybody else along with us.” When the Prophet had finished his prayer with Taslim, he said to the Bedouin, “You have limited (narrowed) a very vast (thing),” meaning Allah’s Mercy.
8:40 Narrated by An-Nu’man bin Bashir
Allah’s Apostle said, “You see the believers as regards their being merciful among themselves and showing love among themselves and being kind, resembling one body, so that, if any part of the body is not well then the whole body shares the sleeplessness (insomnia) and fever with it.”
8:41 Narrated by Anas bin Malik
The Prophet said, “If any Muslim plants any plant and a human being or an animal eats of it, he will be rewarded as if he had given that much in charity.”
8:42 Narrated by Jarir bin ‘Abdullah
The Prophet said, “He who is not merciful to others, will not be treated mercifully.

CHAPTER 11. To recommend to be kind to the neighbour.

8:43 Narrated by ‘Aisha
The Prophet said “Gabriel continued to recommend me about treating the neighbors Kindly and politely so much so that I thought he would order me to make them as my heirs.

CHAPTER 12. The sin of that person whose neighbour does not feel safe from his evil.

8:45 Narrated by Abu Shuraih
The Prophet said, “By Allah, he does not believe! By Allah, he does not believe! By Allah, he does not believe!” It was said, “Who is that, O Allah’s Apostle?” He said, “That person whose neighbor does not feel safe from his evil.”

CHAPTER 13. Whosoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, should not harm his neighbour.

8:47 Narrated by Abu Huraira
Allah’s Apostle said, “Anybody who believes in Allah and the Last Day should not harm his neighbor, and anybody who believes in Allah and the Last Day should entertain his guest generously and anybody who believes in Allah and the Last Day should talk what is good or keep quiet. (i.e. abstain from all kinds of evil and dirty talk).

CHAPTER 14. Enjoining all that is Al-Ma’râf (i.e. Islamic Monotheism, and all that Islam has ordained) is considered as a Sadaqa (charitable gift).

8:50 Narrated by Jabir bin ‘Abdullah
The Prophet said, Enjoining, all that is good is a Sadaqa.”

CHAPTER 15. To be kind and lenient in all matters.

8:53 Narrated by ‘Aisha
(the wife of the Prophet) A group of Jews entered upon the Prophet and said, “As-Samu-Alaikum.” (i.e. death be upon you). I understood it and said, “Wa-Alaikum As-Samu wal-la’n. (death and the curse of Allah be Upon you).” Allah’s Apostle said “Be calm, O ‘Aisha! Allah loves that on, should be kind and lenient in all matters.” I said, “O Allah’s Apostle! Haven’t you heard what they (the Jews) have said?” Allah’s Apostle said “I have (already) said (to them) “And upon you ! “

CHAPTER 16. The co-operation between the believers.

8:55 Narrated by Abu Musa
The Prophet said, “A believer to another believer is like a building whose different parts enforce each other.” The Prophet then clasped his hands with the fingers interlaced. (At that time) the Prophet was sitting and a man came and begged or asked for something. The Prophet faced us and said, “Help and recommend him and you will receive the reward for it, and Allah will bring about what He will through His Prophet’s tongue.”

CHAPTER 17. The Prophet was neither a Fâhish (one who speaks bad words) nor a Mutafahhish (one who speaks obscene evil words to make people laugh).

8:58 Narrated by Anas bin Malik
The Prophet was not one who would abuse (others) or say obscene words, or curse (others), and if he wanted to admonish anyone of us, he used to say: “What is wrong with him, his forehead be dusted!”

CHAPTER 18. (What is said regarding) good character and generosity and what sort of miserliness is disliked.

8:60 Narrated by Jabir
Never was the Prophet asked for a thing to be given for which his answer was ‘no’.
8:64 Narrated by Anas
I served the Prophet for ten years, and he never said to me, “Uf” (a minor harsh word denoting impatience) and never blamed me by saying, “Why did you do so or why didn’t you do so?”

CHAPTER 19. What is forbidden as regards calling bad names and cursing.

8:71 Narrated by Abu Dhar
That he heard the Prophet saying, “If somebody accuses another of Fusuq (by calling him ‘Fasiq’ i.e. a wicked person) or accuses him of Kufr, such an accusation will revert to him (i.e. the accuser) if his companion (the accused) is innocent.”
8:73 Narrated by Thabit bin Ad-Dahhak
(who was one of the companions who gave the pledge of allegiance to the Prophet underneath the tree (Al-Hudaibiya)) Allah’s Apostle said, “Whoever swears by a religion other than Islam (i.e. if somebody swears by saying that he is a non-Muslim e.g., a Jew or a Christian, etc.) in case he is telling a lie, he is really so if his oath is false, and a person is not bound to fulfill a vow about a thing which he does not possess. And if somebody commits suicide with anything in this world, he will be tortured with that very thing on the Day of Resurrection; And if somebody curses a believer, then his sin will be as if he murdered him; And whoever accuses a believer of Kufr (disbelief), then it is as if he killed him.”

CHAPTER 20. What is disliked of NamIma (calumnies).

8:82 Narrated by Hudhaifa
I heard the Prophet saying, “A Qattat will not enter Paradise.”

CHAPTER 21. What is disliked of praising a person.

8:87 Narrated by Abu Bakra
A man was mentioned before the Prophet and another man praised him greatly The Prophet said, “May Allah’s Mercy be on you ! You have cut the neck of your friend.” The Prophet repeated this sentence many times and said, “If it is indispensable for anyone of you to praise someone, then he should say, ‘I think that he is so-and-so,” if he really thinks that he is such. Allah is the One Who will take his accounts (as He knows his reality) and no-one can sanctify anybody before Allah.” (Khalid said, “Woe to you,” instead of “Allah’s Mercy be on you.”)

CHAPTER 22. Jealousy and mutual estrangement are forbidden.

8:90 Narrated by Abu Huraira
The Prophet said, “Beware of suspicion, for suspicion is the worst of false tales; and do not look for the others’ faults and do not spy, and do not be jealous of one another, and do not desert (cut your relation with) one another, and do not hate one another; and O Allah’s worshipers! Be brothers (as Allah has ordered you!”)
8:91 Narrated by Anas bin Malik
Allah’s Apostle said, “Do not hate one another, and do not be jealous of one another, and do not desert each other, and O, Allah’s worshipers! Be brothers. Lo! It is not permissible for any Muslim to desert (not talk to) his brother (Muslim) for more than three days.”

CHAPTER 23. What sort of suspicion is allowed.

8:93 Narrated by ‘Aisha
The Prophet said, “I do not think that so-and-so and so-and-so know anything of our religion.” (And Al-Laith said, “These two persons were among the hypocrites.”)

CHAPTER 24. (It is recommended) that a believer should conceal what sins he may commit.

8:95 Narrated by Abu Huraira
I heard Allah’s Apostle saying. “All the sins of my followers will be forgiven except those of the Mujahirin (those who commit a sin openly or disclose their sins to the people). An example of such disclosure is that a person commits a sin at night and though Allah screens it from the public, then he comes in the morning, and says, ‘O so-and-so, I did such-and-such (evil) deed yesterday,’ though he spent his night screened by his Lord (none knowing about his sin) and in the morning he removes Allah’s screen from himself.”

CHAPTER 25. Al-Hijra (to desert or) cut one’s relation with another Muslim, i.e., not to speak to him on meeting him. The Prophet said, “It is not lawful for a man to desert (not to speak to) his brother (on meeting him) for more than three days.’

8:100 Narrated by Abu Aiyub Al-Ansari
Allah’s Apostle said, “It is not lawful for a man to desert his brother Muslim for more than three nights. (It is unlawful for them that) when they meet, one of them turns his face away from the other, and the other turns his face from the former, and the better of the two will be the one who greets the other first.”

CHAPTER 26. The Statement of Allah, : “0 you who believe! Be afraid of Allah, and be with those who are true (in words and deeds).” (V.9:119) and what is forbidden, as regards telling of lies.

8:116 Narrated by ‘Abdullah
The Prophet said, “Truthfulness leads to righteousness, and righteousness leads to Paradise. And a man keeps on telling the truth until he becomes a truthful person. Falsehood leads to Al-Fajur (i.e. wickedness, evil-doing), and Al-Fajur (wickedness) leads to the (Hell) Fire, and a man may keep on telling lies till he is written before Allah, a liar.”

CHAPTER 27. To be patient when one is harmed (by others). [And the Statement of Allah : “Only those who are patient will receive their reward in full without reckoning!”] (V.39:10)

8:121 Narrated by Abu Musa
The Prophet said: None is more patient than Allah against the harmful saying. He hears from the people they ascribe children to Him, yet He gives them health and (supplies them with) provision.”

CHAPTER 28. To be cautious from being angry.

8:135 Narrated by Abu Huraira
Allah’s Apostle said, “The strong is not the one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong is the one who controls himself while in anger.”
8:137 Narrated by Abu Huraira
A man said to the Prophet , “Advise me! “The Prophet said, “Do not become angry and furious.” The man asked (the same) again and again, and the Prophet said in each case, “Do not become angry and furious.”

CHAPTER 29. Hayâ

8:138 Narrated by Abu As-Sawar Al-Adawi
‘Imran bin Husain said, “The Prophet said, ‘Haya’ does not bring anything except good.” Thereupon Bashir bin Ka’b said, ‘It is written in the wisdom paper: Haya leads to solemnity; Haya leads to tranquility (peace of mind).” ‘Imran said to him, “I am narrating to you the saying of Allah’s Apostle and you are speaking about your paper (wisdom book)?”

CHAPTER 30. If you do not feel ashamed (of doing something), you can do whatever you like.”

8:141 Narrated by Abu Mas’ud
The Prophet said, ‘One of the sayings of the early Prophets which the people have got is: If you don’t feel ashamed do whatever you like.” (See Hadith No 690, 691, Vol 4)

CHAPTER 31. To be cheerful with the people. Ibn Mas’üd said: Mix with the people on the condition that your religion is not injured, and joke with your family.

8:150 Narrated by Anas bin Malik
The Prophet used to mix with us to the extent that he would say to a younger brother of mine, ‘O father of ‘Umar! What did the Nughair (a kind of bird) do?”

CHAPTER 32. A believer is not to be stung twice (by something) out of one and the same hole.

8:154 Narrated by Abu Huraira
The Prophet said, “A believer is not stung twice (by something) out of one and the same hole.”

CHAPTER 33. What kinds of poetry, Rajaz and Hida allowed and what kinds thereof are disliked.

8:166 Narrated by Ubai bin Ka’b
Allah’s Apostle said, “Some poetry contains wisdom.”
8:167 Narrated by Jundub
While the Prophet was walking, a stone hit his foot and stumbled and his toe was injured. He then (quoting a poetic verse) said, “You are not more than a toe which has been bathed in blood in Allah’s Cause.”
8:168 Narrated by Abu Huraira
The Prophet said, “The most true words said by a poet were the words of Labid. He said, i.e. ‘Verily, everything except Allah is perishable and Umaiya bin Abi As-Salt was about to embrace Islam.’

CHAPTER 34. It is disliked for one to indulge in poetry to the extent that It diverts him from Allah’s remembrance, and from (religious) knowledge and from the (recitation of) the Qur’ân.

8:175 Narrated by Ibn ‘Umar
The Prophet said, “It is better for a man to fill the inside of his body with pus than to fill it with poetry.”

CHAPTER 35. What is said about one’s saying: “Wailaka (Woe to you).”

8:188 Narrated by Anas
A bedouin came to the Prophet and said, “O Allah’s Apostle! When will The Hour be established?” The Prophet said, “Wailaka (Woe to you), What have you prepared for it?” The bedouin said, “I have not prepared anything for it, except that I love Allah and H is Apostle.” The Prophet said, “You will be with those whom you love.” We (the companions of the Prophet ) said, “And will we too be so? The Prophet said, “Yes.” So we became very glad on that day. In the meantime, a slave of Al-Mughira passed by, and he was of the same age as I was. The Prophet said. “If this (slave) should live long, he will not reach the geriatric old age, but the Hour will be established.”

CHAPTER 36. Calling the people by their father’s name (on the Day of Resurrection).

8:196 Narrated by Ibn ‘Umar
The Prophet said, “For every betrayer (perfidious person), a flag will be raised on the Day of Resurrection, and it will be announced (publicly) ‘This is the betrayal (perfidy) of so-and-so, the son of so-and-so.'”

CHAPTER 37. The statement of the Prophet ‘Al-Karm is only the heart of a believer.’

8:202 Narrated by Abu Huraira
Allah’s Apostle said, “They say Al-Karm (the generous), and in fact Al-Karm is the heart of a believer.”

CHAPTER 38. To change a name for another name which is better than the first.

8:212 Narrated by Abu Huraira
Zainab’s original name was “Barrah,” but it was said’ “By that she is giving herself the prestige of piety.” So the Prophet changed her name to Zainab.

CHAPTER 39. Whoever, while calling a friend, omits a letter from his name.

8:221 Narrated by Anas
Once Um Sulaim was (with the women who were) in charge of the luggage on a journey, and Anjashah, the slave of the Prophet, was driving their camels (very fast). The Prophet said, “O Anjash! Drive slowly (the camels) with the glass vessels (i.e., ladies).”

CHAPTER 40. The name which is most disliked by Allah.

8:224 Narrated by Abu Huraira
Allah’s Apostle said, “The most awful name in Allah’s sight on the Day of Resurrection, will be (that of) a man calling himself Malik Al-Amlak (the king of kings).”

CHAPTER 41. To say ‘Alhamdu-lillâh’ (praise be to Allah) on sneezing.

8:240 Narrated by Anas bin Malik
Two men sneezed before the Prophet. The Prophet said to one of them, “May Allah bestow His Mercy on you,” but he did not say that to the other. On being asked (why), the Prophet said, “That one praised Allah (at the time of sneezing), while the other did not praise Allah.”

CHAPTER 42. What is liked regarding sneezing, and what is disliked regarding yawning.

8:242 Narrated by Abu Huraira
The Prophet said, “Allah likes sneezing and dislikes yawning, so if someone sneezes and then praises Allah, then it is obligatory on every Muslim who heard him, to say: May Allah be merciful to you (Yar-hamuka-l-lah). But as regards yawning, it is from Satan, so one must try one’s best to stop it, if one says ‘Ha’ when yawning, Satan will laugh at him.”